OK, not so in need of therapuetic writing. I'll give a synopsis.
Eva was riding horse (being led around) on Friday at 2pm. She and another girl were bucked off. Other girl was fine, Eva went by ambulance to Fargo. She has 9 staples in her the back of her head and a skull fracture. She never had loss of consciousness, but doesn't remember all parts. Her neuro assessments have always been clear. CT scan showed no brain abnormalities and there are no fragments of bone that they can see that have affected the inner layer of head/brain. The fracture is kind of like taking an aluminum can and denting it. The current big risk is of meningitis. A PICC (peripheral intravenous central catheter) line was placed, a minor surgery that took 40 minutes longer than expected and almost caused me to jump over the side of the 6 story railing. So, that will remain in her arm and we will administer IV antibiotics 4x/ day that take about 60 minutes to administer. I will not be able to go to work because I'll have to do this. I don't trust my husband, but maybe I'll get to that point. She will not be going to school for at least a week when we return to the neurosurgeon (whom was much, much kinder today if you read the past blog). The fracture will take 6 months to heal, it is not a surgical situation as it wouldn't do much good. She will be on limited activity (no gym, recess, etc) until that is fully healed. She will be at an increased risk of seizures for her entire life (<1%) because of the irritation to her cortex. It is Sunday, and we are going home later this afternoon when a nurse will come out and teach us how to do the meds.
She is not supposed to have visitors at least until after we see the doctor next week and then we will talk about lifting restrictions. Some have asked what to send Eva. Inappropriate gifts would be as follows: A pony, an ATV, stilts, etc. (come on, I can't be sad forever!) Appropriate gifts: movies and arts/crafts. Eva was doing so much better last evening, laughing and joking and telling Chris he's not funny. She's a little "blue" again today after the PICC line placement and her arm really hurts. I can't believe this is the same kid that screams like a crazy person when you cut her toenails and used to cry because she was scared of garbage and bugs outside. She did say that she's still going to cry when we cut her toenails though. She has been tougher than I would be, not even scared of taking a shower or coming her hair and asking to see her staples.
Thanks for all your well wishes. We all love Eva and I appreciate your thoughts and prayers.
Mommy.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Poor Eva
Poor Eva. She's still the sweetest thing ever. She woke up feeling pretty good and went down for her CT scan. SHe says "this is the thing that hurt the leastest." Then she had some visitors and then her head really started to hurt and she started to look horrible. I started to get very mad and scared that her brain was swelling or something and started yelling that I was going to pick her up and carry her down and chase the Neuro guy in the ICU until he told me what was going on (this was noon, the scan was at 8am.) So, he finally came up and in his wonderful "I don't have any social skills so I became a neurosurgeon" method, he told us what was going on.
No brain swelling, everything inside looks fine. There are not fragments of bone that have perforated the brain lining or anything. So, I'm asking him if she should where a helmet and he then starts telling me that the biggest risk is for meningitis. Since she had a laceration into the skull and blood, that is the biggest risk. He's talking that she needs to be on antibiotics..... OK, I'm figuring oral. Then I ask if she should go to school. He say "not until you see me." He's still not explaining any of this... when I'll see him, why we need to be so careful, what we are trying to avoid...... finally he yells at me "this little girl fell hard enough to crack her skull and she has a brain injury. This is a very serious condition." Well thank you ass hole, you could've told me that in the first place. If you tell me I need to drink poison to make my little girl better, I'll do it. But, I'm not a mind reader.
So, she needs to stay home and be closely watched for fever and seizures and signs of infection until we see him (yeah right!!!! Until we see a DIFFERENT neurosurgeon). She really shouldn't be walking anywhere alone in case she would have a seizure and fall until she's more healed. And the great thing, he's yelling all of this in his loud, Boston accent IN FRONT OF Eva. So, all she hears is "no school for two weeks" and starts crying as soon as he leaves. The saddest part is that she has to have a pic line placed and we have to give her IV anti-biotics for that time. So, we tell her about that and they come in to do it and the nurse anesthetist comes in and I say "Oh, it's this kind of sedation? She just ate 1.5 hours ago." The whole thing is cancelled, poor Eva cried for an hour about it.
So, Eva is just so sad. It's so unfair. She has this whole body to fall on and she falls on her head. She could've broken her leg and this would all be less scary. However, I know it could've been worse. Those are the wonderful images that will haunt me. The real, scary image of seeing her fall just morphs into the stuff we've seen on movies when you close your eyes. Grey's Anatomy has made this entire experience much worse. Eva's really not talking much, she's just so sad. She turned down chocolate for the first time ever and I then proceded to ask her 100 questions to make sure her head injury wasn't get worse. She's just so sad. My brother Nolan went through this last year with an infection after an ACL repair. It was horrible to watch him go through it, but watching a 5 year old is even worse.
No brain swelling, everything inside looks fine. There are not fragments of bone that have perforated the brain lining or anything. So, I'm asking him if she should where a helmet and he then starts telling me that the biggest risk is for meningitis. Since she had a laceration into the skull and blood, that is the biggest risk. He's talking that she needs to be on antibiotics..... OK, I'm figuring oral. Then I ask if she should go to school. He say "not until you see me." He's still not explaining any of this... when I'll see him, why we need to be so careful, what we are trying to avoid...... finally he yells at me "this little girl fell hard enough to crack her skull and she has a brain injury. This is a very serious condition." Well thank you ass hole, you could've told me that in the first place. If you tell me I need to drink poison to make my little girl better, I'll do it. But, I'm not a mind reader.
So, she needs to stay home and be closely watched for fever and seizures and signs of infection until we see him (yeah right!!!! Until we see a DIFFERENT neurosurgeon). She really shouldn't be walking anywhere alone in case she would have a seizure and fall until she's more healed. And the great thing, he's yelling all of this in his loud, Boston accent IN FRONT OF Eva. So, all she hears is "no school for two weeks" and starts crying as soon as he leaves. The saddest part is that she has to have a pic line placed and we have to give her IV anti-biotics for that time. So, we tell her about that and they come in to do it and the nurse anesthetist comes in and I say "Oh, it's this kind of sedation? She just ate 1.5 hours ago." The whole thing is cancelled, poor Eva cried for an hour about it.
So, Eva is just so sad. It's so unfair. She has this whole body to fall on and she falls on her head. She could've broken her leg and this would all be less scary. However, I know it could've been worse. Those are the wonderful images that will haunt me. The real, scary image of seeing her fall just morphs into the stuff we've seen on movies when you close your eyes. Grey's Anatomy has made this entire experience much worse. Eva's really not talking much, she's just so sad. She turned down chocolate for the first time ever and I then proceded to ask her 100 questions to make sure her head injury wasn't get worse. She's just so sad. My brother Nolan went through this last year with an infection after an ACL repair. It was horrible to watch him go through it, but watching a 5 year old is even worse.
Friday, November 28, 2008
A SAD, SAD POST
Well, the Hanson holiday curses strikes again. Holiday 2004: Travis' cleft news. Holiday 2006: miscarriage. Holiday 2007: amubulance ride after having Luke. Holiday 2008: Eva fractures her skull after a horse bucks her off.
The kids were just so good at Thanksgiving. We barely heard from them as we grown-ups chatted and played games. So, the next day we told Eva and Travis that they could do something fun because they were so good. Travis wanted to go combining. Eva wanted to go horse riding at a friend of my parent's house. She'd been out there before riding horse and LOVED it.
So, Grandpa Gerry takes Travis, Chris and I take Eva. On the way out there I think to myself "I would just love to make her wear a helmet if we would have one with. But, we don't and it's probably better because I'm just being over protective." We get the horse out and I just haven't been around horses for so long and I'm just thinking what a chicken I am. Eva wants the saddle on so that she can hold on. They put it on and she and another girl ride. They walk away and I think "I really want to walk beside her and hold onto her." But, I know she's done this before. Last time they just walked around and around for at least 30 minutes. Well, they are about 50' away and the horse kind of spooks. Eva says she hung on that time and Memory (the girl leading the horse) kind of straightens them out and then the horse kicks up it's rear legs and the two girls go flying about 7' off the ground (it was a tall horse) and land. THe other girl stands up and starts crying. Eva is lying crumpled on the ground.
We run as fast as we can over there and she is now crying and crying and there is blood everywhere. She's got a big open cut on the back of her head. Memory is a RN in the ICU and Gloria (the lady's whose horse it was) used to be an EMT with my mom. So, we decide that the cut is not bad enough to call the ambulance and that we'll drive and get stiches.... I just keep yelling "what do I do? What do I do?" I think that Gloria was actually close to as scared as I was and really didn't know what to do either. So, we're applying pressure and there's blood everywhere. So, we get in the van and start driving.
Then the reality kicks in. I start to think of all the billions of things that we should've thought of initally. She fell from 7' in the air and landed on the ground hard enough to put a huge gash in her head. (We don't think the horse stepped on her.) She could have a neck or back injury, she probably has a brain/ head injury, she could have a collapsed lung, she could have internal bleeding, etc, etc. Now, I'm freakin' out. We call 911 and meet and ambulance and I can't pull it together and I can't believe that I carried her in a cradle position with her neck and back hyperflexed and are her pupils responding and can she move her feet and is her abdomen filling with blood. It was just the scariest and it scares me even re-writing. Chris holds it together until he gets in the van to follow us to the hospital, doing this again for the second time in 11 months. I feel better with the paramedics doing something, Chris now is crying and crying and not knowing what's going on and driving 95 mph to the hospital. It's the longest drive ever and she's just so scared and I'm crying and it was like a nightmare. I just kept asking her questions and questions to see if she could remember or knew what was going on.
They do a CT scan of the neck and head after all other things are ruled out. Neck was clear. Skull has a compression fracture that is 2mm displaced. She showed no signs of brain injury or bleeding in the CT scan or by evaluation. She lost consciousness for a very brief period. She doesn't really remember falling or the van or ambulance ride, although she was alert and responding for that. THe neurosurgeon didn't think that surgery would be helpful at all and he wouldn't do it. He said they could immediately transfer her to the cities, but he was quite sure that they would make the same call. She has 9 staples in the back of her head.
We are staying in the hospital overnight tonight (Friday), CT scan 8am tomorrow morning, and then possible discharge tomorrow afternoon or one more night of observation. The nuerosurgeon said that some of those skull fracture fragments irritated the cortex of the brain and now she will be at increased risk of seizures (<1%) for the rest of her life. He said it could happen 5-10 years down the road. He said that if she was an adult, they would put her on an anti-seizure med preventatively, but they don't do that with kids because of the side effects.
Eva is just such a sweet girl. SHe's just so sweet. She said it wasn't the horse's fault. She wanted to know how the other girl is. She cried and cried in the van "I WANT MY GRANDMA." It was just so scary. She says "hospitals are no fun." Then she says "This is the worstest day ever." Chris and I then start to talk about how scary it was and I say "I think it was my scariest day ever, but you're OK. So, I think when the baby in my tummy died was my saddest day." She sits for a good minute or two and says "this day was the scariest, but it was much worse when the baby died." I love my sweet girl.
I was very scared about Travis's thing when we found out and his birth was very scary for me. But, this was just as scary. This tops the list for Chris. He is very shaken up about it. I think the "might have been" thing really scares us. She could've been stepped on or landed and broke her neck........ I think I should've just walked with her or listened to my gut. She's still got a scary series of scans and x-rays to make sure nothing is happening in there and I'll be watching her like a hawk for any sign of a seizure. She won't we able to participate in gym or run or do anything that she might fall down doing. So, please pray for our sweet girl. Just sit after reading this and say a prayer for her. She is very brave and has done such a great job. She will just be laying low for awhile.
Get out the bubble wrap for my kids now. I want to build a bubble and never let them cut out and just keep them safe in there. I never want them to ride in a vehicle again for fear of an auto accident. It just could've ended so badly. You all can do whatever you want, but I know now that we really do have the worst luck. Two kids fell off, one walked away. We have the broken skull and while I wouldn't wish that on anyone, I just keep wondering "why us?" Although, Chris and I keep saying, "Do we have really bad luck or really good luck?" Although we've had many horrible, scary things happen, we've always been OK. That seems maybe like we have some good luck. The angels were helping Eva today. I'll be a little crazy for awhile. That was awful. Trauma for sure to our darling baby girl and to the both of us. We just sat and stared at her and kissed her non-stop for about 8 hours in the ER. We'd kind of apologize to her and she just kept saying "it's OK." She liked it. She really started crying when they talked about the stiches and then I started crying and the doctor said "Eva, you have to try not to cry because that just makes mommies cry." She stopped and just looked at me instead. Sad, scary. Please, please, please pray her scan is OK tomorrow.
Erika
The kids were just so good at Thanksgiving. We barely heard from them as we grown-ups chatted and played games. So, the next day we told Eva and Travis that they could do something fun because they were so good. Travis wanted to go combining. Eva wanted to go horse riding at a friend of my parent's house. She'd been out there before riding horse and LOVED it.
So, Grandpa Gerry takes Travis, Chris and I take Eva. On the way out there I think to myself "I would just love to make her wear a helmet if we would have one with. But, we don't and it's probably better because I'm just being over protective." We get the horse out and I just haven't been around horses for so long and I'm just thinking what a chicken I am. Eva wants the saddle on so that she can hold on. They put it on and she and another girl ride. They walk away and I think "I really want to walk beside her and hold onto her." But, I know she's done this before. Last time they just walked around and around for at least 30 minutes. Well, they are about 50' away and the horse kind of spooks. Eva says she hung on that time and Memory (the girl leading the horse) kind of straightens them out and then the horse kicks up it's rear legs and the two girls go flying about 7' off the ground (it was a tall horse) and land. THe other girl stands up and starts crying. Eva is lying crumpled on the ground.
We run as fast as we can over there and she is now crying and crying and there is blood everywhere. She's got a big open cut on the back of her head. Memory is a RN in the ICU and Gloria (the lady's whose horse it was) used to be an EMT with my mom. So, we decide that the cut is not bad enough to call the ambulance and that we'll drive and get stiches.... I just keep yelling "what do I do? What do I do?" I think that Gloria was actually close to as scared as I was and really didn't know what to do either. So, we're applying pressure and there's blood everywhere. So, we get in the van and start driving.
Then the reality kicks in. I start to think of all the billions of things that we should've thought of initally. She fell from 7' in the air and landed on the ground hard enough to put a huge gash in her head. (We don't think the horse stepped on her.) She could have a neck or back injury, she probably has a brain/ head injury, she could have a collapsed lung, she could have internal bleeding, etc, etc. Now, I'm freakin' out. We call 911 and meet and ambulance and I can't pull it together and I can't believe that I carried her in a cradle position with her neck and back hyperflexed and are her pupils responding and can she move her feet and is her abdomen filling with blood. It was just the scariest and it scares me even re-writing. Chris holds it together until he gets in the van to follow us to the hospital, doing this again for the second time in 11 months. I feel better with the paramedics doing something, Chris now is crying and crying and not knowing what's going on and driving 95 mph to the hospital. It's the longest drive ever and she's just so scared and I'm crying and it was like a nightmare. I just kept asking her questions and questions to see if she could remember or knew what was going on.
They do a CT scan of the neck and head after all other things are ruled out. Neck was clear. Skull has a compression fracture that is 2mm displaced. She showed no signs of brain injury or bleeding in the CT scan or by evaluation. She lost consciousness for a very brief period. She doesn't really remember falling or the van or ambulance ride, although she was alert and responding for that. THe neurosurgeon didn't think that surgery would be helpful at all and he wouldn't do it. He said they could immediately transfer her to the cities, but he was quite sure that they would make the same call. She has 9 staples in the back of her head.
We are staying in the hospital overnight tonight (Friday), CT scan 8am tomorrow morning, and then possible discharge tomorrow afternoon or one more night of observation. The nuerosurgeon said that some of those skull fracture fragments irritated the cortex of the brain and now she will be at increased risk of seizures (<1%) for the rest of her life. He said it could happen 5-10 years down the road. He said that if she was an adult, they would put her on an anti-seizure med preventatively, but they don't do that with kids because of the side effects.
Eva is just such a sweet girl. SHe's just so sweet. She said it wasn't the horse's fault. She wanted to know how the other girl is. She cried and cried in the van "I WANT MY GRANDMA." It was just so scary. She says "hospitals are no fun." Then she says "This is the worstest day ever." Chris and I then start to talk about how scary it was and I say "I think it was my scariest day ever, but you're OK. So, I think when the baby in my tummy died was my saddest day." She sits for a good minute or two and says "this day was the scariest, but it was much worse when the baby died." I love my sweet girl.
I was very scared about Travis's thing when we found out and his birth was very scary for me. But, this was just as scary. This tops the list for Chris. He is very shaken up about it. I think the "might have been" thing really scares us. She could've been stepped on or landed and broke her neck........ I think I should've just walked with her or listened to my gut. She's still got a scary series of scans and x-rays to make sure nothing is happening in there and I'll be watching her like a hawk for any sign of a seizure. She won't we able to participate in gym or run or do anything that she might fall down doing. So, please pray for our sweet girl. Just sit after reading this and say a prayer for her. She is very brave and has done such a great job. She will just be laying low for awhile.
Get out the bubble wrap for my kids now. I want to build a bubble and never let them cut out and just keep them safe in there. I never want them to ride in a vehicle again for fear of an auto accident. It just could've ended so badly. You all can do whatever you want, but I know now that we really do have the worst luck. Two kids fell off, one walked away. We have the broken skull and while I wouldn't wish that on anyone, I just keep wondering "why us?" Although, Chris and I keep saying, "Do we have really bad luck or really good luck?" Although we've had many horrible, scary things happen, we've always been OK. That seems maybe like we have some good luck. The angels were helping Eva today. I'll be a little crazy for awhile. That was awful. Trauma for sure to our darling baby girl and to the both of us. We just sat and stared at her and kissed her non-stop for about 8 hours in the ER. We'd kind of apologize to her and she just kept saying "it's OK." She liked it. She really started crying when they talked about the stiches and then I started crying and the doctor said "Eva, you have to try not to cry because that just makes mommies cry." She stopped and just looked at me instead. Sad, scary. Please, please, please pray her scan is OK tomorrow.
Erika
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
election coverage
Our awesome daycare lady, Sheila, taught the kids all about voting and who the candidates are and such. Eva had a vote at school as well and Obama won at daycare and school. Travis thought the names were funny....
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